Things That Go Bump

Do you have one story in your life that is so funny you laugh to the point of crying no matter how long ago it happened and no matter if it was really funny to begin with?

I had one (I’m still sorry about your ankle, JK).

Now I have two, thanks to Marc. I’m not sure it will even be that funny if I tell. Maybe what is funnier is watching me (in person) not being able to get the words out for laughing so hard. Even as I sit here next to him, typing and laughing he rolls his eyes and shakes his head.

So, here goes:

That wiggly bed, we each had one. Twin sized. It was soft, and by soft I mean a bit broken down. You had to be careful when rolling over not to shimmy the mattress right off the boxspring.

Middle of one night I woke with start and a great kathunk right next to my head. I gingerly stuck my hand out (I have no real idea why) and felt Marc on the floor next to my bed. Wha…? He wasn’t really moving or saying anything so I poked on him a bit more and tried to figure out what had happened.

As I became more alert I noticed his mattress was flipped on its side and sort of wedged between him and the bed. Was he dreaming of being tumped off a float in the pool? He still wasn’t moving. I righted his mattress and whispered if he was ok. With a mumbled response we both got back into our beds. The thought running through my head over and over while trying to fall back to sleep was, the thing that goes bump in the night is Marc.

You really don’t expect your 39 year old husband to fall out of bed. Come morning I find out he rolled over too close to the edge and the boxspring collapsed. He wasn’t moving because he slammed his foot into my bed and had landed on the hard tile and was trying not to moan in pain out loud. The kids – slept through the whole thing.

See, not that funny and yet cracks me the hell up.